Wednesday, January 19, 2022

Fifty Swifties

Tom and Tom were chatting:

 

"Let's play Scrabble, " said Tom quizzically.

"Have you met my parasitic arachnid Francis?" said Tom frantically.

"How clever your Tom Swifty was," said Tom shadily.

"Read between the lines," said Tom flippantly.

"I can't see through this fog," said Tom mysteriously

"I need glasses," said Tom blindly.

"I see," said Tom spectacularly.

"I'm very knowledgeable about physics," said Tom matter-of-factly.

"I'm voting Green Party for president," said Tom insufferably.

"Politically I'm an idiot," said Tom conservatively.

"What are your pronouns?" said Tom thematically.

"CRT is probably the reason my roof is leaking," said Tom problematically.

"Is my hat crooked?" said Tom jauntily.

"I'm meditating," said Tom thoughtlessly.

"Can I sit over there instead?" said Tom movingly.

"I've got holes in all of my clothes," said Tom tearfully.

"I'm losing my hair," said Tom, distressed.

"Is there a public restroom around here?" said Tom dutifully.

"Can I come in?" said Tom outstandingly. 

"Cat got your tongue?" said Tom with a painful expression.

"I got laid off for some reason," said Tom robotically.

"I'm storming the castle.  Who's with me?" said Tom revoltingly.

"Please blow your nose," said Tom Hanks.

"Let's go for a boat ride," said Tom Cruise.

"That crow can't speak," said Tom Brokaw.

"I don't know what kind of bagel to get," said Tom plainly.

"We don't have butter," said Tom imperiously.

"Pass the Froot Loops," said Tom serially.

"My upper arm hurts," said Tom humorously.

"We're all part of the cosmic organism," said Tom jointly.

"What's on TV?" said Tom programmatically.

"I'm a developer," said Tom programmatically.

"We need a Green New Deal," said Tom programmatically.

"I'm in favor of grammar," said Tom programmatically.

"I'm about to be a father," said Tom laboriously.

"I'm not a vampire," Tom reflected.

"I'm a fan of East German Figure skating of the 1980's," said Tom wittily.

"Have you read Common Sense?" said Tom painfully.

"I know who I'd want to be marooned with," said Tom gingerly.

"I miss us" said Tom exasperatingly.

"I'm sorry for smiling," said Tom with chagrin.

"I take my plomb everywhere," said Tom with aplomb.

"Could I please get some crity?" said Tom with alacrity.

"Did you hear Roy Orbison died?" said Tom mercilessly.

"Time to feed the pigs," said Tom sloppily.

"Time to sing my aria," Tom intoned.

"Time to shout a somewhat impressive-sounding verb," Tom vociferated.

"Could I be lactating?" Tom expressed.

"I'm sick of your games", said Tom swiftly.

"Time is up.  Put your pencils down," said Tom finally.


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